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Home › Articles › General Family Finance › Crossing the Line

Crossing the Line

When Shopping Becomes a Compulsion

By Stacey Porto

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I struggle when I go into stores. I want to buy something. Anything. When I shop, I lose all sense of good judgment. I don't care how penniless I am, how I'll pay my bills or how guilty I'll feel afterward. I just want to shop. And when I go into a store, the excitement of the clothes, jewelry and shoes intoxicates me. I am a compulsive spender.

Experts estimate that between 2 and 8 percent of the population are compulsive spenders like I am. Ninety percent are women. But isn't there a fine line between healthy and unhealthy spending?

Determining If You Have a Problem
"Unhealthy spending is spending that is prompted by some negative internal state," says April Benson, Ph.D., editor of the book, I Shop, Therefore I Am: Compulsive Buying and the Search for Self (Jason Aronson, 2000). She explains that it's not about a particular need or desire for that object, but for the high that comes from the shopping. This maladaptive preoccupation with shopping that a compulsive spender has, she says, leads to some significant impairment in their financial, family or work life. A husband threatening a divorce because of his wife's spending, debt that drives a person to financial ruin or even a job loss because a person shops online all day are some examples, she says.

My experience as a compulsive spender began as soon as I had my own money to spend. I was 19 and had my first job as a waitress. I knew the power of money: how it could buy nice things and make me feel better. I used shopping as a crutch for coping with life's ups and downs. When my family was going through tough times, when I felt insecure about things, when I had negative feelings, shopping was the solution. As the years went on I would continue to shop to fight depression, loneliness or anxiety, at night or on the weekends. These feelings would be triggered by a bad day at work, dating disappointments or not feeling good about myself that day.

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