Each month, iParenting.com spotlights a father who inspires and moves us, who embodies the qualities that we all admire in a person, a man and a father. Above all, the Dad of the Month is dedicated to his children. Rich or poor, famous or not, he shines as an example of what fathering is all about.

Our choice for December is Joel Levy, M.Ed., founder of Bully Education Theater and father of two.

"It's not if they will succeed, it's how they will succeed." – Sensei J. Levy

Joel Levy wears many hats. He’s a New Jersey state-certified teacher, entrepreneur, family safety expert, licensed and certified tactical master instructor, personal protection specialist, founder of Bully Education Theater, dad, stepdad and husband. He also wears many belts. Levy is a fifth-degree black belt and was named USA Martial Arts Hall of Fame Grandmaster of the Year in 2004. But Levy’s blanket of security is his family.

High-kickin’ Family
Yvonne, a former elementary school teacher, has been a part of Levy’s life from an early age. The two were classmates in Hebrew school kindergarten, and because of their parents’ interesting ethnic mix (their dads are Yemenite Jews and their moms are Jews of European origin), the two quickly became friends. "I always considered Yvonne to be like a sister to me when we were little kids," says Levy.

The two remained classmates until they were 13 years old. "We lost touch for 13 years then re-met as adults," says Levy. "I remember seeing her for the first time in 13 years and knowing instantly we were meant to be together. I left it alone because at the time she was married and had just had her first child (Rachel). I really felt like I had blown it by not being in touch for so long. On the other hand, I did not want to create any conflict, so I did not contact her again."

About a year later, Levy learned that Yvonne was getting divorced. "We just talked for a long, long time before we actually got together," says Levy. "Finally we did and we’ve been married seven and a half years." Levy became "Aba" (Hebrew for dad) to Rachel, and the couple had two children together, Shoshana, 6, and Moshe, 2.

Levy says Rachel, now 11, is interested in photography, fashion and art. Shoshana, who is in first grade, loves to draw, read and bake. Moshe, the youngest of the Levy crew, loves doing puzzles, talking on the phone and "taking things apart and putting them back together," says Levy.

The family also loves to travel. "It gives us a chance to see new things and experience them together," says Levy. "We always use our family-safety plan, which I teach in my family safety course. That way my wife and children always know exactly what to do should something happen. My kids are easy to travel with. They always say the most fun part of traveling isn’t the place we go to, but the trip there."

Sensei J. Levy
Martial arts are a big part of Levy’s life, and he keeps on reaching new goals. On April 24, 2004, Levy was inducted into the USA Martial Arts Hall of Fame, as Grandmaster of the Year for 2004. And in July 2004, he became certified in the Superfoot System by living legend Bill "Superfoot" Wallace, who is now Levy’s head instructor. He will test for his sixth degree black belt later this year.

Levy’s wife and kids are also involved in the martial arts. Yvonne has her black belt in karate and is the program’s director and head KinderKarate instructor at their karate school, Family Martial Arts Academy, in Highland Park, N.J. "She was inducted this year into the U.S.A. Martial Arts Hall of Fame for her work teaching KinderKarate," says Levy. "Rachel is a junior black belt and has been doing karate since she was 4 years old. Shoshana is a junior purple belt and has been doing karate since she was 2 1/2. Moshe is always on the karate floor, hitting the bags and trying to follow along with the exercises."

Levy feels martial arts are important for children. "Aside from becoming very physically fit and learning to defend themselves, children develop self-confidence, which leads to success in all other things," says Levy. "Martial arts also builds focus, respect, self-discipline and self-esteem. In addition, children learn goal setting and have a positive channel for their energy."

Bully Education Theater
Another area Levy is passionate about is bullying. He is founder of Bully Education Theater, which is a course that utilizes strategies and role-playing to teach children and adults how to stand up to the bully without fighting. "It teaches them how to overcome fear, stop the bullying cycle and walk away with confidence," says Levy. "This course does not address physical bullying, but its more common counterpart, mental or psychological bullying." Levy says Bully Education Theater stemmed out of the need to teach children how to handle times when they were being attacked verbally or socially or somehow other than physically. "Most of the time, people bully each other psychologically or emotionally," he says. "Very rarely is it physical. If someone is verbally bullying, physical self-defense is not the answer. My students needed to learn mental and emotional self-defense."

Wanting to do something about this problem, Levy consulted Dr. Terrence Webster-Doyle, author of Why Is Everybody Always Picking on Me? A Guide to Handing Bullies (Weatherhill, 1999) and created his own program. "We now do this program in schools and organizations throughout New Jersey," says Levy. The mission of Levy’s Family Martial Arts Academy is "to leave the world a little bit better than the way we found it, through martial arts." Through his work and his family, this mission is well under way to becoming a reality.

Want to see more?

• Karate Kids: Children and the Martial Arts
• I Think My Child Is Being Bullied: A Guide for Parents
• Battling Bullies: Putting an End to Schoolyard Conflicts
• Relational Aggression: Helping the Young Victims of Emotional Bullying
• Talk about it!