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Tyler Wainright
By Kelly Burgess
Each month, iParenting.com spotlights a father who inspires and moves us, who embodies the qualities that we all admire in a person, a man and a father. Above all, the Dad of the Month is dedicated to his children. Rich or poor, famous or not, he shines as an example of what fathering is all about.
Tyler Wainright is just an ordinary guy. He has a job, a wife, two kids and a blog. It's the blog that makes Wainright extraordinary. Called Building Camelot, it's an unusually introspective look at being a husband and father and how to do both better. With entries like "5 Things That Surprised Me Most About Marriage," "101 Awesome Sites for Men, Husbands and Fathers" and "10 Ways to Love Your Wife," it's a blog sure to inspire dads and husbands.
Wainright has known for a while that he wanted to write a blog – his first attempt was a blog focusing on golfing. The problem was that when his family started growing, he had less and less time to golf, so he was writing about something he wasn't doing. He still wanted to write, but didn't know exactly what to write about.
"As I surfed other blogs I discovered the ones that were the best were those where you could tell the person lived that topic every day – they had a passion for the subject," Wainright says. "It made me think about what I was that involved in, and it occurred to me that my day-in-and-day-out life revolved around being a husband and father."
He came up with the name Building Camelot after reading a book called The 4 Pillars of a Man's Heart by Stu Weber. "Camelot is the ideal of life, and we all want to build our personal oasis at home and be the queen and king of our lives," Wainright says.
Wainright says that writing does not come easy to him. While he does occasionally make traditional entries about his day or milestones in his children's lives, he generally tries to find a wider theme for his posts. When he can't, he says, he often just doesn't write anything at all.
"I struggle with the fact that I'm not an expert," Wainright says. "I haven't been married for 50 years and my kids are very young. I want my blog to be a resource for other men, but sometimes I wonder if I'm qualified to provide that."
Wainright was born, raised and went to school in Memphis, Tenn. He attended the University of Memphis, graduating with a degree in information systems, and now works as logistics product manager for a large medical company. He's known his wife, Mandy, virtually his entire life, but they didn't start dating seriously until late in their college years. They've been married seven years and have two children, Olivia, 3, and Madelyn, 3 months.
"Having this shared background and culture means we share a lot of the same values, and in many ways that makes parenthood easier," Wainright says. "There are still things we struggle with on a day-to-day basis, such as discipline and other small things, but we both have a shared vision of the long term and that keeps us focused."
One thing that shaped both Wainrights was the painful divorces of both their sets of parents when they were in their early teens. Although they now have amicable relationships, Wainright says it wasn't always easy to adjust, and there are things with which they still struggle. Still, this makes him more determined to work hard at his own marriage.
And hard work it is. With both Wainrights working full-time, along with a toddler and a new baby, he says they sometimes feel as if they are going nonstop. He says right now they're struggling to find a balance, because his wife has just returned to work after maternity leave, and they haven't gotten into the rhythm of the new schedule yet.
"We're trying to keep things from getting too hectic by not scheduling anything on weekends," Wainright says. "That allows us to have lazy mornings and family-friendly weekends, but the reality of the situation is that there are things that need to be done and only so many hours in the day."
It's this refreshing honesty, and his willingness to share his doubts and struggles, that makes Wainright's blog such a captivating read. It's something his fellow husbands and fathers can relate to, perhaps more so than to advice dished out by an "expert."
"I really just kind of do this for myself and haven't thought too much abut where I want to take it," Wainright says. "I like reading blogs that are intimate and personal and I'm trying to achieve that style. As long as I can provide some useful articles and inspiration, that's my main goal."
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