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Home › Webmother's Musings

Helping Kids Handle a World in Turmoil

By Elisa Ast All

The other day my kindergartner, CJ, told me about an event that happened at school.

"We had a tornado drill! We had to go in the hallway and duck our heads down, like this!"

With wide-eyed innocence, he showed me the proper way to tuck his head into his knees and wait quietly until the storm passed. My eyes welled with tears – not only because I was so proud of my son, but also because I remembered the days when tornados were the worst disasters for which kindergartners had to prepare.

When we were kids, the enemy to beware of was the boogeyman – that mysterious stranger who would take you away in a dirty white van. These days, our kids are learning their enemies may be from far-flung countries that hate them simply because they are American. They are seeing that freedom isn't free and liberty isn't guaranteed. And for the first time ever, they may feel vulnerable here at home.

With the world awash in turmoil, it's more important than ever to make our kids feel safe. Even though we ourselves may feel overwhelmed, anxious or frightened, we must protect our kids and raise them to feel secure. The world may seem like a tornado, spinning out of control, but you can make your home a safe haven for your family.

Here are some strategies for bringing calm in the chaos from Dr. Gail Gross, child behavior/development expert:

  • Reassure your children that you can protect them. Children need a safe place to express their fears and beliefs. Create an emergency plan for children. Practicing that plan with children will create a sense of balance and control.
  • Children look to us as the adults, and that is the role we must play in this time of terror. If necessary, reach out for professional help to guide and support yourself as well as your children.
  • Monitor your children's television time and content. Also, children will receive misinformation from other children during school time. By listening and talking, parents can diffuse rumors and share what children are hearing in school as well as in the media.
  • Watch for signs of stress, including changes in appetite, sleep, socializing and schoolwork. Young children show more neediness and attachment. Older children become more aggressive as a way of controlling feelings of fear and helplessness. Teens may exhibit signs of depression.
  • Take positive action such as giving blood, writing letters, sending care packages to relief agencies and volunteering as a family. This gives children something constructive to do with their emotions, and that alone can lower anxiety.

After preparing yourselves and your homes for potential crises, what may be most important of all is protecting your children's innocence and sense of self. Communicate with your kids, maintain your routine and don't forget to have fun as a family. As American parents, we don't have to tuck our heads into our knees and wait for this storm to pass.

For more information from Dr. Gail Gross, visit DrGailGross.com.